god! finally, it’ll be the end of the semester and hopefully as i end ma semester i’ll also be able to end ol this foolishness… well, i started out ma semester as yah know the day in the life thing… ’bout him.., like first day of school and der i was looking for him.. well, i cud say that i succeeded.. yeah somehow i did, coz if i can rem’ber it right…, ol i wish for God is to be close with him.. and i did.. only i wasn’t expecting that i’ll fall for him..! i just wish i cud be close enough to know him bettah.., more than an ordinary foreign service student that oweiz loiter in the corridor of Lyceum…. i was fortunate for God did let me be close unto him.. only now i wish that i should’ve wished for more than bein’ close..( who knows God myt even give it to me ayt?) i guess it was too late… =(
hhmm.. this semester will be the most memmorable amongst all.., i won’t forget.., everythin’ changed.., now as i end this semester i was olso looking forward to end ma connections with him.. (if there’s a connection.. ) it was really hard in ma part to  avoid him.. yeah, it was hard given the fact that he was not even aware that his friend was totally head ovah heels unto him…! though i have no plans to reveal it  yet.. (i mean yet!), a day b4 graduation will do… im co0l with it..
i guess, i was doing the ryt thing, not replying, not loitering on his ground, what else.., not passing on the roads that he myt be passing too…. i guess, it won’t be unfair to him, coz, lets say he did the same thingie too! only that i was able to catch him once in a while and it fucked hurts! now im the one whose bein’ crazy hiding from him.. (as if he’s looking for me?), i just like to know if will he miss ma presence?
i know i sound like a hopeless desperate maiden..,but its the truth…, at least by now im a lil’ bit fine.., i cud stand ma whole day without a thought of him.., unless somebody remin me ’bout him… haiiizzzzz, i nid to step out of this illussions (dillussions rather.) next semester.. i want to  be focussed on ma major subjects, i want to  keep ma head on ma books and study hard.., i guess ol i want from now is a companion but not an affair, coz nobody tries i guess… hahaha.. well, if god will have mercy on me and happens to give him back or give a new one…, well Thanks.. i’ll be very much obliged to be happy…. if not, i guess carreer first.., after all its oweiz d excuse of those who wer so unfortunate in their lovelyf… hibihiihi…

one year to go and we’ll be graduating.. one year to go and maybe i cud tell him that i used to love him while he’s so innocent ’bout it..! that he mademe cry for like a thousand times.., that he filled ma mind and his not even aware that he makes a gal crazy….! i cud just imagine ayt now what will be he’ss reaction…
so damn shocked! like he’ll gonna say "darn it kat, r u serious?"  hehehe  those black eyes will be puffing out of its sockets..! ohh those black hypnotizing eyes…. i guess above all those eyes are  the most precious mem’ries i’ll ever have…. those eyes that once laid on me…
that nose.., it kills me to stair at those nose… 
i guess th elips olso.. everythin’….
its one of the things i’ll be treasuring after graduation…
do yah think will ever see each otha again?
yeah after grad.?
how i wish.. then maybe by that time we can correct everything..
(the nerve… kat.. stop it)
neweiz, by now ol i want is to finish this sem and maybe i’ll be done with him…
(still, something hir deep insyd craps with the thought of leavin’ him..still wanna try even though how hopeless it seams.. only i have to fyt it.. )
T_T (crying)…..

if he opnly knew…